I know I don’t know you Sam, but can I just send up a little cheer for your bravery, courage, determination. Every step you take outside is a victory that only you could have won. I’m proud of you and what you are writing is precious to many people. One step at a time. I don’t suffer as you suffer, and can only apologise if what I have written has been intrusive and clumsy. You have inspired me, and I want to thank you for that x
All the medical advice is 'Get outside, do more exercise, don't drink. don't smoke, eat healthily, meditate'.
So when you do all those things and yet still have the demons visit then you feel so bloody inadequate.
Just hearing that someone else feels this way lifts an enormous weight. To twist a saying - a problem shared is a problem halved - well I honestly feel that you've halved my 'problem'.
Thank you for putting it so well and I wish you a speedy and lengthy return of the light.
Thanks Ali, I'm both happy and sad to hear of your familiarity with this situation... I'm glad my words resonated but sorry you've experienced the same. It's so hard when you're already doing 'all the right things' and you go under. Then someone says 'have you tried St John's Wort? and you feel like punching them (ha ha!)
So true - and don't start me on cold water swimming/immersion which I have been doing for years (in a gorgeous place) and whilst I like doing it it never 'sets me up for the day'!!
As a therapist for nearly 40 years I have tricks, but like you, knowing them, even practising them thoroughly and vigorously doesn’t always do the trick.
Truly this is one of the best pieces of writing on depression I have come across. It is mightily brave and generous of you to share it. Go gently, and I will too.
Dear Sam, I hear and feel your pain and know this feeling all to well. I promise you it does get better and the only thing I found that helped was time and determination. Please keep taking that step outside as the darkness hates you moving and doing the opposite it demands and also remember you are never alone and that your continued fight will be worth it very soon. Take care. X
A powerful piece of writing. Anyone suffering from depression knows all too well that sometimes it has no rhyme or reason and it feels like doing all the usual advised things doesn't help. But I always try to think how much worse it could be if you don't make the effort to drag yourself outside and keep going ... March is particularly tough time of the year for me when the body resources are depleted from long winter and the spring sunshine hasn't kicked in properly yet.
I know I don’t know you Sam, but can I just send up a little cheer for your bravery, courage, determination. Every step you take outside is a victory that only you could have won. I’m proud of you and what you are writing is precious to many people. One step at a time. I don’t suffer as you suffer, and can only apologise if what I have written has been intrusive and clumsy. You have inspired me, and I want to thank you for that x
Thank you so much Sarah. It’s lovely of you to reach out - and it helps.
That is so helpful Sam. Thank you.
All the medical advice is 'Get outside, do more exercise, don't drink. don't smoke, eat healthily, meditate'.
So when you do all those things and yet still have the demons visit then you feel so bloody inadequate.
Just hearing that someone else feels this way lifts an enormous weight. To twist a saying - a problem shared is a problem halved - well I honestly feel that you've halved my 'problem'.
Thank you for putting it so well and I wish you a speedy and lengthy return of the light.
Thanks Ali, I'm both happy and sad to hear of your familiarity with this situation... I'm glad my words resonated but sorry you've experienced the same. It's so hard when you're already doing 'all the right things' and you go under. Then someone says 'have you tried St John's Wort? and you feel like punching them (ha ha!)
So true - and don't start me on cold water swimming/immersion which I have been doing for years (in a gorgeous place) and whilst I like doing it it never 'sets me up for the day'!!
I've started doing it too, since I moved up here. I love it, but yes... agreed!
A wonderfully lucid and vital piece Sam and hoping the light returns soon xx
Thank you Liz. I hope so too…
Thank you. I feel you.
As a therapist for nearly 40 years I have tricks, but like you, knowing them, even practising them thoroughly and vigorously doesn’t always do the trick.
This brought tears to my eyes and made me feel seen. Thank you.
Thanks so much... I'm touched that it resonated with you...
It really did—I’m on a similar journey. Your piece made me think of mine this one of mine: https://open.substack.com/pub/jodiproctor/p/spring-solace?r=3ym6r4&utm_medium=ios
Reach toward the light - lovely...
Oh this was wonderful, Sam, tender, heartfelt, true. Thank you for writing it
Thank you for reading, and commenting. It is reassuring - depression makes me fearful of making wrong moves and missteps.
Truly this is one of the best pieces of writing on depression I have come across. It is mightily brave and generous of you to share it. Go gently, and I will too.
Dear Sam, I hear and feel your pain and know this feeling all to well. I promise you it does get better and the only thing I found that helped was time and determination. Please keep taking that step outside as the darkness hates you moving and doing the opposite it demands and also remember you are never alone and that your continued fight will be worth it very soon. Take care. X
That’s so kind Mark, thanks. And I wish you continued light…
A beautiful piece of writing, Sam. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you, Jimmy 🙏
A powerful piece of writing. Anyone suffering from depression knows all too well that sometimes it has no rhyme or reason and it feels like doing all the usual advised things doesn't help. But I always try to think how much worse it could be if you don't make the effort to drag yourself outside and keep going ... March is particularly tough time of the year for me when the body resources are depleted from long winter and the spring sunshine hasn't kicked in properly yet.
Thanks Katherine. As spring gathers strength, it does feel - a little bit, at least - that I am doing the same. Hope you are too…